Nonrecommended Cover Letters
Nonrecommended Cover Letter I

July 20, 2003

Dear Ms. Withheld:

I found your posting on Teachers-Teachers.com. I’m very interested in your position and would like to submit my résumé for consideration.

Thank you,


Bob Brown

What’s wrong here:
• Too brief.
• No valuable information. Remember, the cover letter is your potential employer’s first impression of you; so sell yourself professionally and briefly.

Nonrecommended Cover Letter II

May 17,2003

Dr. Withheld:

I saw your opening posted on your Web site indicating that you are anticipating vacancies in special education areas this fall. I would like to submit my résumé for consideration.

After researching Anywhere School District by visiting your official Web site, I have not been able to find the salary scale for your teachers. I hold my bachelor’s and master’s degrees in special education and would require a minimum base salary of $42,000 and a relocation package to teach in Anywhere School District. Although this salary is actually below my current yearly wage, I am willing to consider a drop in pay since the cost of living is lower in Anywhere than where I currently reside in California.

Please refer to my enclosed résumé for additional information on my educational background and previous teaching experience. I also have included a list of references. If your starting salary can meet my minimum requirements, I can be reached at (999) 999-9999. Thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely


Judy Jones

What’s wrong here:
• Brings up salary, which should not be listed in a cover letter.
• Closing remark about salary is rude; reads like an ultimatum.
• Tone of letter is demanding and arrogant.

Nonrecommended Cover Letter III

April 2, 2004

Mr. Withheld:

I saw your vacancy for a Phys Ed. Teacher on Teachers-Teachers.com. I am excited about this position because you also are looking for a basketball coach.

I have over 15 years experience teaching PE and over 10 years as an assistant basketball coach. I am looking to leave where I am because recently the head coach with my current school retired, and I was not asked to replace him. As you can imagine, this was a slap in the face. I decided to quit as the assistant coach and am looking for a school who will value me.

As the assistant coach, my team’s record has been 198-33. I am a good coach and well liked by my student athletes. For this reason, you will find references listed from some of my former student athletes but not from my current administration.

I guarantee I can produce a winning team within three years at Any School. I will call you next week to discuss where we go from here.

Sincerely,


Joe Schmoe

What’s wrong here:
• Reference to former position is negative.
• Potential administrator will be concerned that applicant has no recommendation from current employer.
• Closing is aggressive and assuming.